This past year I had a chance to attend a talk (satsang) with Jeannie Zandi. If you haven’t had the chance to attend a satsang, the gist is that, if you’re lucky*, you are in a group of genuine people asking about their agony. The roaring wound in them that can’t seem to heal. (*If you are unlucky, and at a satsang with people who are trying to pin down concepts, it is like attending a pretty maddening spiritual debate club.)
The general question the ego wants to ask all spiritual teachers in satsang is, “What is wrong with me that I can’t X? When will I Y? What is wrong with me? Am I the worst of the bunch? The one that will never be free?” And Jeannie has a particular loving touch about this.
One woman asked her about why she couldn’t turn away from the suffering of all animals. What was wrong with her that she couldn’t stop obsessively caring about the animals? She felt almost embarrassed that she couldn’t stop thinking of ways to save them all.
I find it fun to sit with a mature teacher and imagine how I would answer, and then listen for how much deeper and wider and more loving their answer is….